You don’t need to pinch yourself. Seriously, that did actually just happen.

Barcelona fell to their heaviest European defeat of all time on Friday evening as Bayern Munich stormed to a terrifyingly dominant 8-2 victory, in a game which felt eerily similar to an adult taking a back garden kickabout at a five-year-old’s birthday party far too seriously.

8-2. Let’s repeat that: 8-2.

The crazy thing about this game is that it actually started fairly evenly. Barcelona could have netted five in the first ten minutes.

They forced David Alaba into an own goal, hit the post and had a Luis Súarez shot well saved by Manuel Neuer, and it looked like we could be in for a 10-10 kind of game.

Bayern decided to hold up their side of the bargain, tearing Barça’s defence open with terrorising ease.

Thomas Müller, Ivan Perišić and Serge Gnabry were all on the score sheet in the first half, with Müller finding the back of the net twice to ensure that this tie was over at half time. Even at 4-1, this looked embarrassing for Barcelona.

If only we knew what was coming.

The worst was yet to come for Barça. Joshua Kimmich fired home after a run from Alphonso Davies which may very well force Nélson Semedo into an early retirement, before Robert Lewandowski beat the offside trap to head home.

And the worst was still yet to come.

Off the bench came Philippe Coutinho – the same Coutinho who joined Barça for £142m, was deemed to be a flop and shipped out on loan to Bayern – and he scored. Twice. You can’t make this stuff up.

There’s a lot of things which won’t be forgotten quickly from this game. We’ll be talking about it for a long, long time.

However, the best thing to come out of the whole thing?

This tweet.

Literally three minutes before the beating began. Comedic timing at its finest.

Just 11 years after their formation, RB Leipzig booked a Champions League semi final meeting with Paris Saint-Germain the Champions League semi final with a 2-1 victory over a disappointing Atletico Madrid.

The Bundesliga side dominated the first half but had to wait until the the 51st minute to take the lead through Dani Olmo. The introduction of Joao Felix rejuvenated Atleti and the Portuguese wonderkid would win and convert a penalty to level things up soon after.

Leipzig would have the last laugh though courtesy of 21-year-old Tyler Adams, whose shot was deflected past Jan Oblak with two minutes left to play.

Here’s 90min’s player ratings on a historic night in Lisbon…

Peter Gulacsi (GK) – 7/10 – His ‘trip’ on Saul in the opening stages was clumsy but went unpunished. Nearly saved Joao Felix’s penalty and made a huge stop in the dying seconds.

Marcel Halstenberg (RB) – 7/10 – Spurned a gilt edged chance early on but bounced back with a composed defensive performance.

Dayot Upamecano (CB) – 9/10 – Completely humiliated Diego Costa with an imperious performance. As well as being spot on defensively he also strided out of defence with confidence. Surely a move to a European giant is on the cards in the future?

Lukas Klostermann (CB) -7/10 – Gave away the penalty but in fairness there was very little he could do. Upamecano dealing with Costa and Atleti’s impotence gave him very little to do.

Angelino (LB) – 8/10 – Drove his side forward well down the left-hand side. Once again showed that he has a role to play at Manchester City next season when his loan expires.

Marcel Sabitzer (CM) – 8/10 – His pinpoint cross helped put Leipzig ahead. It was one of several impressive deliveries from Leipzig’s creative hub. An fine round the corner pass also led to Leipzig’s winner.

Kevin Kampl (CM) – 8/10 – Got through a lot of pressing and shifted to form a back three when his side were in possession. More than that though, he used the ball incredibly well in what was a brilliant all-round performance.

Konrad Leimer (CM) – 8/10 – The pressing machine was absolutely everywhere, forming a double pivot with Kampl when defending and shifting to right-wing back in possession (yes, really).

Christopher Nkunku (RW) – 5/10 – The Frenchman looked bright but struggled badly with decision making in the final third.

Yussuf Poulsen (ST) – 7/10 – Held up the ball nicely and contributed well to his side’s build up play – albeit with some disappointing missteps sprinkled in.

Dani Olmo (LW) -7/10 – Scored to help Leipzig secure the biggest result in their history. Will be disappointed to have been substituted with 10 minutes of normal time to go

Tyler Adams – 7/10 – Barring a big deflection, Adams’ late effort at goal would likely have flown wide. But instead, Stefan Savic got in the way and that, as they say, is all she wrote.

Amadou Haidara – 5/10

Patrik Schick – 6/10

Jan Oblak (GK) – 6/10 – The best goalkeeper in the world could do nothing about either goal and was largely untroubled otherwise.

Kieran Trippier (RB) – 5/10 – Caused a lot of problems by Angelino and Olmo. Offered little going forward in a subdued display.

Stefan Savic (CB) – 7/10 – Received a nasty blow to the head in the first but battled on. Made a few good stops and clearances.

Jose Gimenez (CB) – 7/10 – Will be disappointed to concede two as he largely performed all of his duties well. Kept Poulsen from running in behind well.

Renan Lodi (LB) – 6/10 – His decision to throw himself to the ground when in a promising position in the Leipzig penalty box was incredibly stupid. His dead ball delivery was very good though.

Koke (RM) – 6/10 – A pretty nothing performance from the seasoned Atleti veteran. Did little on the ball and was surprisingly easy to bypass in midfield.

Saul Niguez (CM) – 6/10 – Had a weak penalty appeal turned down in the first half. Offered very little and should have tracked the run of Adams who scored the winner.

Hector Herrera (CM) – 5/10 – Spent the game chasing shadows as Leipzig’s midfield gave him the runaround. Was withdrawn after an hour.

Yannick Carrasco (LM) – 6/10 – His side’s most dangerous attacker in the first half, which isn’t saying much. This early promise fizzled out as the game progressed.

Marcos Llorente (SS) – 5/10 – Screeched like a jackal following a hefty challenge from Upamecano. His only notable contribution in what was a poor performance.

Diego Costa (ST) – 4/10 – One of the striker’s worst ever Champions League knockout performances. He went through his full arsenal of dirty tricks by Upamecano had an answer for everything. It was all a bit embarrassing really.

Joao Felix – 8/10 – Has been criticised throughout the season for failing to live up to his ridiculous price tag, but Portugal’s wonderboy was very, very good when he came on. Won and converted Atleti’s penalty, and looked like the only player capable of stretching the game.

Alvaro Morata – 6/10

Felipe – 6/10